It’s no secret that I take great pride in being the most narcissistic leader in the history of Conservative Christianity. Indeed, my grasp on reality is to tenuous that by comparison Bobby Duncan’s pretentious claim to provincial status is a mere fleeting whimsy. When it comes to self-obsession I set the standard to which even the Ould twins can but dream of attaining. And it was me who taught the Archbishop of Canterbury everything he knows about plain speaking.
Yet after reading this link - sent to me by a most Dearly Beloved Sinner – the awful truth is dawning that in our midst may be One whose bootlaces not even I am worthy to tie. Or at any rate I wouldn’t be if he wasn’t such a slip-on loafers kind of guy. Stolen loafers.
That’s right: for those of you who haven’t already clicked the clicky I’m talking about ACNA’s favourite felon - little Don Armstrong. Who after spending years protesting his total innocence is now insisting with the same fervour in an interview with little David Virtue that the verdict which resulted in him being ordered to repay $99,247.00 while undertaking 400 hours community service “made good sense and was correct”.
There’s just too many gems to list them all. Naturally the piece reflects Mr. Virtue’s typically unique reportage, but this time there’s something more… a kind of brilliance, perhaps… or maybe just the sort of delusional arrogance rarely seen beyond the walls of federal institutions for serial recidivists. My personal favourite is the way the minister of “the only traditional Anglican parish in town” avoids explaining exactly what he’ll be doing during those 400 hours. Although letting slip that he managed to finangle his followers into paying the bill for his defence comes a close second.
No doubt each of you will find your own special moments in this masterpiece, and I’d encourage you to share them here. To start things rolling here's one selected by Bishop Quinine:
How large is your parish?Like the Bishop says, obviously the stress of it all has prevented Donny from realising he’s no longer in court, and can now stop lying.
About 500 families.
I’m Father Christian and I teach the Bible.