Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Lessons Matt Kennedy Learned When Attempting Theft - #13

13. Make friends with the religion reporter or whoever your local paper assigns to follow the story. Always answer the phone. Always call back. Always have something to say both on the record and off. Always speak well of your opponents. Never say “no comment”. Never refuse to answer your phone. Never let them hear you whine, complain or attack the diocese. Let the diocesan press stooge play the role of the offended, entitled, bitter, angry, and intolerant authority figure. And trust me, he/she will. .
As Bishop Clumber already wisely advised back in the comments to Point 2, only let the world see the real you on “... a website where everyone is basically whining, complaining and attacking the church which gave you the authority to be a pastor! That way it will be lost among the noise.”

Everywhere else you should be as genuine and sincere as a lap-dancer working a room full of Shriners.

8 comments :

Fr Hugh Jass said...

Fr Matt Kennedy is a fine up-standing priest who I deeply admire. His faithfulness to the Church and the Gospel is a manifestion of Christian Love and God's acceptance of everyone.
Er. I don't mean any of that. I meant to write the exact opposite.

Leonardo Ricardo said...

It´s fascinating that all this premeditated/manipulative crapola actually spews forth from the mouth of the tireless/twisted and mitreless grim Fr. flapping lips! No doubt trying very hard, like the Kenyan leadership, to be despised HERE by the common ¨believer in equality¨ at Church/beyond and therefore show signs of great, albeit lonely, righteousness.

Padre Mickey said...

I'm late to all this, and, frankly, I'm confused: is he giving this advice because he was successful? Because I seem to recall that this has not worked out well for our Father, who art in Kenya, Matty be his name.

David |Dah • veed| said...

Padre, I think he is trying to make lemonade.

Anonymous said...

Good pt, Padre. But I do think he has succeeded in lifting up . . . himself. There may be other young men who would like to find a flock of sheep to pontificate to, and to reprimand for any shred of free-thinking that finds its way to a SFIF post. They love a good lie, well told These lessons are certainly the way to go about it. I hope anyone who took a moment to read the original post read some of the comments.

Seriously, the word verification tag is "pighhari". Does Fr Christian select these himself?

Padre Mickey said...

Well then, David, he'll need some sugar and water or that lemonade will taste terrible!

Lynn said...

Father Christian,

Thank you for bringing this wonderful post of Kennedy's to my attention. I advise your readers to scroll down and read the comments. They include excellent advice about how to hide assets in the event of a lawsuit.

MarkBrunson said...

I don't know, Dah*veed,

I think he may be operating on the axiom, "When Life hands you lemons, keep spraying lemon juice into its eyes until it brings you the oranges you originally ordered."