The words of that wonderful old Roger Miller tune are ringing truer than ever, since a release from that wild and crazy bunch of thrill-seekers at The Living Church News Service of the Living Church Foundation Inc. (who says conservatives can’t come up with succinct and snappy names?) suggests folks at the GAFCON Primates Meeting are having such a grand time that they’ve lost the ability to count.
Take this paragraph for example:
“Seven primates: Archbishop Benjamin Nzimbi of Kenya, Archbishop Peter Akinola of Nigeria, Archbishop Emmanuel Kolini of Rwanda, Presiding Bishop Gregory Venables of the Southern Cone, Archbishop Henry Orombi of Uganda; along with the Most Rev. Peter Jensen, Archbishop of Sydney (Australia) began talks on April 14 at hotel near Heathrow airport.”
Let’s hope whoever’s doing the accounting for this little soirée is less numerically challenged than whoever’s writing the spin: when I count the Primates listed here the most I can come up with is five: ++ Kenya (1), ++ Nigeria (2), ++ Rwanda (3), ++ Southern Cone (4), and ++Uganda (5). Even if you count little Pete Jensen - and since not even the Australians are silly enough to make him their primate, you shouldn’t - that’s still only six.
Perhaps little ++Akrofi got lost on his way from West Africa, and ++Tanzania was eaten or something. Or, more likely, Big Pete Akinola got a bit cranky when the missing two accused him of cheating in an after-dinner game of charades, and the public relations people have decided to not mention them in case someone else gets hurt. Either way, it’s certainly good to see the Gafconeers still aren’t letting accuracy and facts get in the way of a good press release.
I’m Father Christian and I teach the Bible.
Since posting this little George Conger has amended his article without explanation (naturally) to include the missing Primates. Which just goes to show that everyone reads Father Christian!