Monday, March 8, 2010

Deacon David Ould lies (again).

Well, well, well – it turns out the bold Martin Luther quotation with which Dobby Ould nailed his thesis to the Viagraville wall didn’t come from Martin Luther at all. Instead it was lifted from a the work of a pious Victorian woman whose specialty was religious sentimentalia of a type we can safely assume Dobby’s Master most definitely does not endorse.

To his credit the foolish house-elf has offered a retraction of sorts, but quite frankly I’m not sure Biblical Christians can accept this, given it is proffered within a context absolutely devoid of any genuine repentance.
The Bible makes it clear that “the time will come when they will not endure sound doctrine; but after their own lusts shall they heap to themselves teachers, having itching ears; And they shall turn away their ears from the truth, and shall be turned unto fables.(2 Timothy 4:3-4).

Further, in Matthew 7:15 Our Lord specifically warned us to be wary of false teachers appearing in these terrible latter days. Just because Dobby was merely parroting something he’d heard elsewhere, or “was only following orders” is hardly any excuse: Deuteronomy 13 is unequivocal when it comes to how we are to respond to those who would lead us astray from the truth: in a nutshell the loving response involves rocks, the commandment to “show him no pity”, and a license to party on the ashes of their home, livestock and neighbours like you’re the Ugandan Synod on crystal meth.

Whilst I well realise the entire theological raison d'être of Dobby and countless others like him involves unquestioningly cutting and pasting what others have claimed to be true, the Scriptures simply don’t cut false teachers any slack on those grounds. If one going to live by Biblical literalism then, like our little house-elf, one must also be prepared to die by the same standard. Or at least face merciless ridicule from those whom you would have dared to persecute.

Finally, Beloved Sinners can rest assured that my Luther quote was indeed authentic. As was the Calvin citation with which I raised Dobby’s spurious attempt to cheat at Reformation Poker – it came from the wild and crazy Genevan’s commentary on Ephesians; Chapter 3, verse 21. And now for a quote that trumps them all: Matthew 23. Clearly it’s one that Dobby's gang at Viagraville have never considered.

I’m Father Christian and I teach the Bible.

23 comments :

Grandmère Mimi said...

From the comments "over there":

As my charismatic friends say,“But it was a blessing anyhow.”

As you are, dear Fr Christian.

Matthew 23 said...

Matthew 23 is one of my totally favorite chapters. Cuts at no end of hypocrisies. Been having a bit of fun with it myself of late.

Lapinbizarre said...

I had already marked how little stomach the radical religious right has for the Jesus of Matthew 23. You'd think they'd welcome this fire-y, outspoken, judgmental Christ with outstretched arms. Surely right up their street. But it ain't. Wonder why?

Lapinbizarre said...

I also have a long-time regard for the now-dormant website Titusoneten, with a sub-header, quoting its namesake text, "For there are many unruly and vain talkers and deceivers...".

Fr. Daniel Weir said...

The quote has appeared and been attributed to Luther by many people. I didn't bother to check it out when I encountered it somewhere and quoted it on my blog (http://frdanweir.blogspot.com/2009/07/where-battle-rages.html). It certainly is consistent with Luther's thought.

Fr. Daniel Weir said...

It took a bit of work, but I discovered that I had picked up the quote in a book by Douglas John Hall, professor emeritus at McGill, and hardly a lightweight.

Tobias Stanislas Haller said...

Fr. Troll, your essay moves me to wonder, in reference to your analogy with the Ugandan Synod, whether the difficulty in the church may not be attributed to a form of Crystal Methodism.

The Rev. Dr. Christian Troll said...

Fr. Daniel: With the greatest respect, "consistent with Luther" is very quickly corrupted into "consistent with my comic-book understanding of Luther as a super-hero just like me and my belligerent conservative cohorts".

Your own usage of the faux-quote was in a very different context, and hardly with the intention of further marginalizing and alienating those whom have already endured a lifetime of being driven far from the doors of our Church. Unlike Dobby, presumed to claim Luther as an ally in his war against those with the sexual equivalent of being left-handed.

If, like Dobby, one arrogantly presents those daring to question one's dubious definition of Anglicanism as "theological illiterates" it's only to be expected that others demand a degree of academic honesty in return. Even if, as Dobby has proven time and time again, honesty is hardly a "reasserter" strongpoint.

Fr. Tobias: That sound you can hear on the breeze is the St. Onuphrius' household and ministry team laughing in delight at your pun. Many thanks!

Edna Shufflebottom said...

I have discovered a Lutheran quote attributed to Peter Ould, Dobby's larger twin.
"When I was larger, people said I was fat. Now that I've lost weight, they say I died."
This was NOT said by an obese "ex-gay", but is a famous saying of Luther Vandross.
http://www.quotesandpoem.com/quotes/showquotes/author/luther-vandross/103530

rajm said...

And always make sure you know your latin before attempting to base your blog url on a typo http://nullusextracruem.wordpress.com/
(I think there's a missing 'c'), but maybe he intended 'null u sex trac rue m' and didn't care about the Luther?

Anonymous said...

You hate each other but are told that you have to love each other or burn?
And this is supposed to convince people how?

The Rev. Dr. Christian Troll said...

This is a Conservative blog, Anon 7:29. If you want love you should visit a liberal like little David Virtue.

The Rev. Dr. Christian Troll said...

Cruem, crucem, shmucem ... who cares about details, rajm? Just as long as it gives the impression you're a Protestant, and that if Luther was around today you'd be his right-hand-man.

Thanks for the chuckle!

The Rev. Dr. Christian Troll said...

... or perhaps he meant to write cruet in a cryptic Eucharistic reference?

Lapinbizarre said...

Arighi Bianchi still in that wonderful building below the station, rajm?

rajm said...

It certainly is - well it was last time I looked - try http://rmstar.blogspot.com/2010/01/looking-down-on-b.html (vanity link to my blog). cruet - ah yes salt and light - I think the parables about pepper must have been censored?

Anonymous said...

He's only a deacon???!!!

That makes his lofty, magisterial dismissals of his betters that much funnier.

Lapinbizarre said...

The diocese of So Carolina grinding into gear again, Fr Troll. The "the faith once for all delivered" making one more obligatory appearance. Not a whimper out of Matthew 23, tho'.

Lovely shot of Arighi-Bianci's in the snow, rajm. Took the Manchester-Stoke line many times in in my student days, and used to admire the building's Crystal Palace-type construction from the train. Will return to your flickr site for snow scenes and, I imagine, more nostalgia, when I don't have three eager, not obsessively continent dogs to attend to. Many thanks for the reply.

rajm said...

Lapin - thanks - I've done both directions - as a daily commute used to work in Kidsgrove and then in Manchester

Anonymous said...

To Anon

I don't think Fr Christian and his team hate each other or, indeed, anybody else. They just poke gentle (okay, not always so gentle) fun at other people's foibles and denunciations. As long as we laugh at our own foibles, what's the problem?

Jane

Anonymous said...

Dr Troll

Have you seen this?

http://www.abc.net.au/compass/s2807909.htm

Lynn said...

We must remember the world is filled with ignorant youth who are lazy in their research.

A quick search will often attribute "here I stand, I can do no other" to U.S. civil rights leader and pastor, Martin Luther King. Of course, the Good Mr. King did use the phrase - even though we are uncertain if Luther did so while dieting on worms.

Pete said...

I am afraid that religous fervor may not be a valid defense to Penal Code 245(a)(1) "Assualt With A Deadly Weapon" here in California.
So in thumbing through scripture to support one's cause...picking up a stone pusuant to Deuteronomy 13 to solve our Central California problems with schismatics squatting in the Episcopal Church building pews may not be the best course of action.