Sunday, March 28, 2010

Leave, don't love: Negotiation Akinola-style.

An illuminating article recently published in the Nigerian Sun tellingly demonstrated the essence of big Pete Akinola’s approach to Christian problem solving: division. “Split Nigeria: Gaddafi’s comment should be re-examined” reads the headline, and even those home-schooled evangelicals listening to some kind person reading them my posts should be able to work out what follows: a proclamation from GAFCON’s man of piece and unity declaring that “although the Libyan leader was not a friend of Nigeria, the import of his comment should not be lost on all”, and that comments accredited to Gaddafi, in which Bedford’s favourite camper argued Nigeria should be divided along North-South Muslim-Christian lines in a similar manner to that which has worked so well in the region now known as the India-Pakistan border, were “indeed divine”.

I support one Nigeria”, said the Mercedes-owning man of the people, “but we have to discuss our continued existence as a nation.” And, My Beloved Sinners, if that little rhetorical flourish doesn’t remind you of His Grace’s approach to the Communion nothing will. If a relationship isn’t working, the GAFCON response is to threaten to leave. Don’t seek to work things through, and never agree to disagree; just split, divide, and make sure you walk away from the break with more assets than the other guy.

There’s no denying the challenges confronting those who would see Nigeria a united and peaceful country bound together under the rule of law are very great indeed, probably even greater than those faced by the Archbishop of Canterbury in his own attempts at performing the ecclesiastic equivalent of herding cats – particularly since most clergy don’t own machetes, or consider kidnapping a legitimate means of supplementing their stipend. Nor can even one as learned and wise as myself honestly claim to have all the answers to ingrained political unrest (although for a first class ticket to Geneva and a suite in a five-star hotel by the lake I’m as prepared as the next United Nations advisor to dishonestly claim otherwise), but there is one question concerning the Nigerian political tensions with which I can be of assistance: when Big Pete asks “Where are the murderers and arsonists that caused mayhem in all the crises we have been having in this country?” the answer’s simple. One of them has just retired, and will be living in a duplex given to him by the Church of Nigeria, in Gudu, a district of Abuja.

I’m Father Christian and I teach the Bible.


Anonymous said...

Who gets the oil revenue if Nigeria splits in two? Will he still be able to continue funding GAFCON? I suspect he has already figured that out.

Fr. Maxwell Smart+

Anonymous said...

Now that, allegedly, +Akinola is without power to actually accomplish the irenic and unity promoting suggestions he is making, they make great sense. Happily he did not engage in them prior to retirement as, in so doing, he might have lost some of the power he enjoyed from his proper pastoring of his North hating supporters. All good evangelicals or other pastoral leaders should pay heed to +Akinola's mentoring here and a good teaching moment: Never make any statements that could endanger your revenue stream, involve personal risk or jeopardize perceived political support, (no matter their pastoral appropriateness) until AFTER retirement when no one can accuse you of failing to act, because, after retirement, you have no power to act. An ignoble sinner but faithful follower

Lapinbizarre said...

" a similar manner to that which has worked so well in the region now known as the India-Pakistan border..."

Point of Order said...

Could this be Dobby's long lost cousin?

"Most Reverend Nicholas Dikeriehi Orogodo Okoh... explained that he...had dismissed Gaddafi’s comment....However...he discovered that the comment deserved a second thought....After a week of pondering over the whole thing, I said to myself, may be the man should not just be dismissed."

It seems that ++Okoh (Oh No, I mean, Yes!) is a man of deep thougth with a streak of independence.

Anonymous said...

Well retirement or no retirement, His Grace is at this moment packing his swimming trunks in preparation for his post Easter getaway in the sunny diocese of Bermuda. Yes dear friends. Big Pete together with some of the other more dubious Primates are spending a little downtime at the luxurious Tuckers Point resort. Talk about share the wealth! dear friends. Thanks to the generosity of a wealthy patron Big Pete and his friends have invited all of our diocesan clergy to a slap up lunch followed by a little chat, how nice it all is. Pity they didn’t bother to ask the diocesan bishop, but why change the habits of a lifetime.
The Dear Old Dean

Anonymous said...

Isn't it nice when a man puts his wife before his ambition and ego? Makes you think that he truly is a man of God and not a religious spruiker!

Lapinbizarre said...

Off topic, but amusing, Gregg Griffith has posted at SF on Christ Church, Savannah's ad campaign to "differentiate" itself from TEC. You will recall that members of the Christ Church congregation recently attempted to hot-foot it to the Duncanite Sect, hauling the church's property with them. A Georgia court ruled otherwise.

The new campaign touts CC's history as "Mother Church" of Georgia (its first-born, St John's, seceded from the Protestant Episcopal Church in 1965, sooner than admit negroes to membership - fun place, Savannah) and proclaims its early association with John Wesley and George Whitfield - faithful, lifelong Anglicans both, each of whom established the precedent of jumping ship with the property.