Young Brother Richthofen just popped in for a visit, and to cheer me up read some of the most hilarious things ever found on the internet. It seems he’s been following the recent trouble in Dumbarton, and in an effort to get a better understanding of things followed the problem back to its source – or at least one of the sources, given that both Satan and innate stupidity also deserve credit. And where he ended up was the Grand Orange Lodge of Ireland.
Now to be perfectly honest these past few days laughing hasn’t been foremost on my mind; it's been one of those times when trivial predilections like breathing assume a disproportionate importance. Still, thanks to your prayers, the altruistic pharmacists at Roche who gave the world Tamiflu (not to mention every Republican frat boys’ first-date essential, Rohypnol), and the kind of medical care that Obama diabolically feels should be available to anyone, regardless of whether or not they’ve had the foresight to be born wealthy, WASP and beloved by god, I’m already feeling much better. And while I had been a little despondent at my doctor’s advice to wait at least another week before resuming the Freestyle Motocross training I’d just commenced (one can only do so many BASE Jumps before the endless equipment checks become tedious), Brother Richtofen’s discoveries on the Orange Lodge web site have certainly brightened my morning.
Take this one, for example:
“The Orange Institution is a Christian organisation… It is Christ-centred, Bible-based, Church-grounded.”Or how about the handy “In Your Pocket Guide to Orangeism”? With this little gem by your side you’ll never again find yourself lost for words in a sectarian argument – although I’d recommend you keep it in your jacket pocket, not your trousers. You wouldn’t want to catch anything nasty down there, and the voices of Orangeism aren’t used to that degree of proximity to anyone’s personals.
The most inspiring, however, is this:
“When brethren in Togo, which has a strong Orange movement...”Just when it had begun to look like the trade in bigotry and religious hatred between Africa and the west was all one way...
I’m Father Christian and I teach the Bible.