Saturday, November 7, 2009

A people in rebellion against God.

Christians, even those of us who are infallible Doctrinal Warriors, must always remain open to the possibility of God leading us in new directions, and calling us to face new challenges. Growing in Christian maturity never ceases to bring he possibility of new insights and deeper understanding into the mysteries of our faith.

Which is why I’m not ashamed to admit, my Dearly Beloved Sinners, that I’ve recently been brought by the Spirit to a new conviction concerning a group of people I’ve always considered the Bible as condemning on account of their perverse lifestyle.

These are people who, despite the manifest sinfulness of their chosen way of living, persist in maintaining they “were born that way” - irrespective of the fact that plain common sense, not to mention the entire canon of church tradition (in so far as it refers to such people at all) makes it clear that that they have in fact surrendered themselves willingly to defilement, choosing to become an abomination in the sight of God's self-appointed spokesmen.

Yet without seeking to mitigate their shame and wickedness, I have now seen that just as Rahab proved herself faithful despite being a filthy evil-encrusted denizen of Jericho, there are also - purely by God’s grace – men and women among this group whom I once believed damned perverts who are – I know you’ll find this challenging to hear - actually Christians!

By now I’ve no doubt even the most Biblically Illiterate Episcopalians among you will have realized that the people of whom I have been talking are Ugandans. After all, Natural Order (thanks Bishop Lawrence) proves them utterly steeped in sin. What’s more it’s an indisputable Biblical fact that the Scriptures never so much as once mention Ugandans in a positive light. Nor did Jesus, or God’s son, the Apostle Paul, ever suggest the possibility of someone being both Christian and Ugandan. Besides, if God had wanted people to be Ugandan he would have created Adam and Orombi, not Adam and Eve.

Because St. Onuphrius’ is a caring congregation with a profound sense of mission we have over the years done much to minister to sinners ensared by the Ugandan lifestyle. To those who might claim being Ugandan is a matter of birth and development, or genetics, I would simply draw attention to the men and women who’ve come through our program and whom have now put the shame of their time in the Ugandan deception behind them. Some, for example, now by God’s grace describe themselves as Norwegian, or Latvian, and I personally know of at least one ex-Ugandan now living happily as an Esquimaux.

Which is not to say they don’t still face difficulties. The repentant Norwegians have yet to obtain passports, and since moving to Florida the Esquimaux has experienced terrible difficulties keeping his igloo from melting. Yet challenges like these are part of what it means to be a Christian, or at least they are for those whom GAFCON leaders like myself have successfully burdened with a hefty layer of extra-Biblical guilt. Sure, we’ve witnessed setbacks and failures in those to whom we minister (to be perfectly honest not a single Ugandan has ever experienced lasting reorientation), which is why we prefer not to submit our program to independent evaluation, but against this must considered the fact that we’ve been able to wring a fortune in donations from people who through issues of their own want to support the ministry.

Yet, like St. Peter learning it’s ok to enjoy a little sweet-and-sour pork with gentiles, the Lord recently convicted me to acknowledge what I once believed impossible: a Ugandan blessed with the Spirit and perception of Our Lord. Read his words for yourself and I’ve no doubt that you’ll understand this change in my position. Hopefully it will inspire you to reconsider your own attitude towards those whom you were once certain Scripture declared entirely beyond the reach of salvation. You might even – as I have been called to do – find it in your heart to remember this man and other Ugandans like him in your prayers. Lord knows they need all the help they can get.

I’m Father Christian and I teach the Bible.


Anonymous said...

My own Father-in-God, the Archbishop of York, is himself Ugandan. One could not meet a finer gentleman hailing from that great Christian Nation. He is now happily settled in England, having fled from the terror of Idi Amin who, in a bible-believing way, offered to cut the Primate's head off.

Lapinbizarre said...

Note also, Fr Christian, that in consequence of a long-standing joke in the British satirical magazine Private Eye the expression Ugandan Affairs has a very specific meaning in those parts.

Lapinbizarre said...

Skimming Stand Firm's most recent offerings I find a new term, deeply expressive of its writer's feelings of inclusivity towards his darker-skinned brethren - Episcobonics. What price African Primates?

TheraP said...

Brilliant satire!

Leonard said...

OKELLO LUCIMA for Dictator (I mean the man ought be President for LIFE because we could TRUST HIM)...Bishop Henri Lukeliar Orombi is busy ¨traveling¨ (so many vulneerable targets and hideouts for bigots, so little time) so he´s unable to respond to the Life Inprisonment ¨Anti-Homosexuality 2009¨ that is currently being considered at the Uganda Parliament...he does, we are to understand through one of his underquacks, against the KILL THE QUEER section of the Bill...apparently, Orombi and his accomplices believe in some of Gods Commandments...Hank Orombi is a particularly loathsome kind of blowhard as he excommunicates some of those who would minister to the marginalized, the demonized the sick...such a guy, and he is quick to pontificate about the good old days/daze when he ¨chased them skirts¨...tacky dude who can´t seem to focus on the rampant corruption and human sacrafices in Uganda (as he enjoys weekends in the country with zealots bigots and thieves).

What a guy, skirt chaser and despotic idiot who has no common sense yet is common to the core.

Anonymous said...
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Frank Remkiewicz aka “Tree” said...

I have talked on a number of occasions with a retired Ugandan bishop. He often shared that our two churches are very different. He expresed no desire to raid the US. Something about too small, throw them back.

Boaz said...

Do not be discouraged Father Christian. Even as we speak there are Ugandans who are, and I don't like to use the word but we must not resile from it "brown" who are striving to be "white".

I've never seen it happen but nothing is impossible for those who put their faith in others whose job it is to heal them of their most inner deepest genetic make-up.

And as you say, if there is a quid in it as well as international travel on the gravy train well who suffers? No one that I can see.

Doorman-Priest said...

I am a graduate myself of the ex-Ugandan ministry.