Tuesday, June 15, 2010

Bobby's compromise (and Matt's new job).

As everyone knows, when it comes to little Bobby Duncan’s sect there can be no question about Matt Kennedy and I having always been in complete agreement. Consequently it should come as no surprise to anyone that I heartily endorse the firm stand our boy from Binghamton has been taking over Bobby’s shameful compromise of the Nicene Creed.

Now please don’t get me wrong; when it comes to worshipping with bearded foreigners wearing funny hats I’m the last person to ever cause anyone offense, but last time I looked Article VII of the blessed 39 stated “The Nicene Creed… …ought thoroughly to be received and believed”. Which, as even those among you who were home-schooled by evangelicals should be able to see, makes no reference to “editing and leaving out the prickly bits when meeting with dubious former communists”.

Indeed, one of the reasons I have always been so strong in my support for ACNA was that aside from legalising property theft I’d dearly hoped the new church would continue in obedience to a literal understanding of the Scriptures by campaigning for the reintroduction of slavery, as well as forcing rabbits to once again chew cud in accordance with Leviticus 11:6. Now I am instead shocked to see all the most important canon of the Third Council of Toledo (I’ll bet you had no idea Ohio featured so prominently in Church History) thrown out the window. At this rate it can only be a matter of time, as I’m sure little Matt will agree, that we see Canon 23 from that same decisive council also thrown in the dust – at which point people will once again be blind to the terrible sin of wailing at funerals.

Mind you, none of this is as shocking as young Matt Kennedy’s new side-line. I knew that having to give back the money he tried to steal has left him short for a dollar, but he was the last person I expected to find while researching the Chippendales male strippers web site. See for yourself…

I’m Father Christian and I teach the Bible..


Anonymous said...

Mark 14 v51 "And there followed him a certain young man, having a linen cloth cast about his naked body; and the young men laid hold on him". I believe that this verse is the key to why Mr Kennedy is a Chippendale. He obviously follows Scripture so literally he has become a stripper. This activity is, I believe, followed by lots of homosexualists. Does Mrs Hostillium know?

Anonymous said...

Is this anyway to run to a new religious empire?

"Archbishop Robert Duncan of Pittsburgh, who leads the ACNA, said Tuesday (June 8) that membership grew from 703 congregations to 811 during the last year, a step toward fulfilling his mission to plant 1,000 new churches within the first five years.

Meeting those goals, however, will mean surmounting financial challenges. The church's $1.36 million budget, approved by the ACNA's Provincial Council Tuesday, counts on a new initiative to raise $500,000 within the next six months. If the fundraising comes up short, projects central to establishing the young church's identity may stall."

Fr. Maxwell Smart+

smithj1@unisa.ac.za said...

Are we certain it's the same Matt Kennedy?

Anonymous said...

Peanuts...spare change from self-righteous bigots at Church...amazing...I´m very active with a Latin American NGO who does amazing work with folks/families that live at the City Dump (you can imagine, you´re worst guess is right)...the annual budget, completely made up of mostly U.S. donations (non-zealot, non-assbites, just REAL people with wholesome desires to help others) is $2.5 million...not a problem and ALL focused on the the direct need and fully transparent unlike our not-so-pals the thieves at ACNA!

Spade a spade

Brother David said...

My goodness Spade a Spade, you write a lot like someone I know at the base of a volcano in Guatemala.

Anonymous said...

+++Caroline Divine
It's not often you anglo-catholics talk about the Orthodox; about 25 years ago icons of Harvey Milk were all the rage; now I guess you've discovered that they're even less "progressive" than Benny 16 and some have less than savory pasts in various Communist dictatorships.
Oh well. Live and learn.

Anonymous said...

Speaking of dictatorships...the diplomacy of Jensenism is working wonders in the public school system and doing so much for Christianity in general!. Probably end up dividing the state school system into progressives verses conservatives...and we all thought the public school system was inclusive!
These Anglicans are destructive trouble makers who produce disharmony with their decreed tunnel vision self righteousness.

The Patriarch of the West said...

You are forgetting the blessed 7th canon of the Council of Toledo. It would certain liven up diocesan convention banquets.