Friday, October 10, 2008

African GAFCON Leaders: Chris Sugden

Great Britain is home to not just one, but two fine humorists named Chris Sugden. The first is best known for his character Sid Kipper, a Norfolk folk singer of exceptional insight, while the second, and funnier of the two is an African GAFCON leader.

Shown above, Canon Dr. Sugden, is the Executive Secretary of Anglican Mainstream International, a gloriously English group who in accordance with all the ancient creeds, define themselves as “committed to the traditional biblical teaching on marriage, the family and human sexuality”. Which I’m sure is something the Council of Nicea intended to include, but just didn’t get around to.

In addition to this important task of clarifying what our forebears meant to say, Canon Sugden also serves as Research Tutor and Fellow of the Oxford Centre for Mission Studies, where his African ethnicity gives him first hand experience in understanding the mistakes of the past, and ensuring future generations don’t repeat the arrogant colonialism of the past, when Anglo-Saxon westerners presumed to speak on behalf of others with little or no regard for them as people. As a modern Conservative Christian academic Chris understands that it’s nowadays only acceptable to treat others with this sort of distain when discussing those of a different sexual or theological orientation.

Known colloquially as “Happy” due to his cheerful demeanour when lecturing (as the picture here admirably illustrates), it is not known if Chris has “friends” in any commonly understood sense of the word. He does, however, have a mother (contrary to rumours that he was actually found under a rock somewhere), and a wife, both of whom are pictured below

This photo was actually the cause of some controversy when originally published, since on first glance it appears Mrs. Sugden is actually smiling. In a subsequent statement by the Sugdens this slur was denied, and they explained she was in fact grimacing with revulsion at the thought that at least one in twenty of the hands featured on the quaint wall-hanging behind her belonged to a person who has at some time in the past enjoyed life. And, the Sugdens asked, "Who know's where such hands may have been?"

Chris’ hobbies include acting as a “mediator” on others’ behalf, taking an obsessive interest in matters relating to human sexuality, and accumulating frequent flyers points at other’s expense.

I’m Father Christian and I teach the Bible.


Anonymous said...

I have often thought about the words you put forth here, dear Fr. Christian, and thought I mustn´t wade into dark was, and is, apparent, to me and obviously you, that Canon Dr. Chris Smudgen has been deeply rooted, some might veture to say obsessed,and over-his-overlargish-head, with/in affairs of sturrings of the unthinkably sexually oriented variety usually found most actively South of the ribcage. I will now rest more securely with the knowledge that this obviousity and pewful thing, is, in fact, held by others is way past peculiar and dipping deeply into a emotional cramp of some sort of perversity. Truly a sad day when aledged smiling replaces vigilant thoughts of nude sleeping costumes and other customs thought imported by Henri Luke and Pete to pristine Africa and beyond and below. I would venture that Bishop Vacables and John David would shiver in agreement with thee.

The Most Formally Reverend Melvin Carpington, DDS

david virtue's bountiful bosom said...

Isn't his mother Mollie Sugden?

Two Cents said...

Dear Dr. Of course Mrs., Mrs. and Rev., Jr. Sugden are correct that Christianity runs totally contrary to the enjoyment of life. Are we not called to endure this miserable existence while anticipating the glorious here after? Enjoying life is far too dangerous - I may not get all the heavenly rewards I would otherwise. Such theology is dangerous - shun it immediately. Let us speak no more of such foolishness and get back to our wailing. I'm out of ashes - does St. Onuphrius sell any? Price is no object - I need to suffer deeply. Perhaps Eric might relish the opportunity to offer some of his flesh for the task of making ashes. Suffering brings us closer to Jezuz.

Anonymous said...

The picture of Mr & Mrs & Mrs Sugden is, I believe, misleading. The women happen to be both his wives, which explains his support for polygamous Anglicans in Nigeria.

joseph said...

Forgive my presumption upon your scholarship, Father, but I do believe that the Council of Nicea actaully did dwell upon the topic of "family arrangements". The third canon of the council of Nicea specifically did deal with questions of, errr, "cohabitation" and such things.

Of course, the same set of canons of Nicea also dealt with something akin to what I've heard described as "border crossings" (canon XVI, which seems to have come into vogue again), and my personal favourite - canon XX - telling us when to kneel and stand in the liturgy.

blessings upon your ministry,

The Rev. Dr. Christian Troll said...

Joseph: You're quite right, the good councilors did indeed dwell upon all manner of things - I was thinking in terms of the Creed arising out of their deliberations.

susan s. said...

Oh, Father Christian, thank you so much for the link to Sid Kipper! I especially enjoyed going to his website and seeing the lovely song 'The Happy Clappy Chappy' from "Country Cod Pieces." I am sure that I will be bookmarking him.

Anonymous said...

I (a female) am currently engaged to my partner (a male) - although we are not planning a religious marriage ceremony, we are going to be planning a 'marriage' ceremony of some kind. My sister and her partner (a female) recently came to visit us and we started discussing the countries where same-sex marriage is currently legally recognised. To my surprise and utter dissapointment, there were only 10 countries in the whole world on this list and the UK is not one of them (correct me if I am wrong). I have recently looked into the UK governments same-sex marriage views and was pleased to read that Nick Clegg thought that " although civil partnerships have been a step forward, until same sex marriage is permitted it is impossible to claim gay and straight couples are treated equally."

My sister and her partner are now engaged and as we are living in a 'democratic society' where the human rights act (1998) states that '[one of] your human rights [is]' 'the right to marry and to start a family' (, I was wondering when my sister and her same-sex partner will have the same 'human rights' as myself and my opposite-sex partner in regards to marriage?

I still find it surprising and am saddened by the thought that in 2012, this most basic human right for same-sex couples is being violated. Given your position on marriage, I was wondering where you sit on other human rights? Do you for example, feel that the right to Nationality is applicable only to specific groups? Do you think it is just that the right to a fair trial should be limited only to a certain group, say heterosexuals?