Wednesday, October 29, 2008

A little house-keeping

There’s a few domestic matters needing attention around here which should have been taken care of weeks ago. Normally anything not directly relating to the Core Ministries of Teaching the Scriptures, Generating Revenue and Raising My Personal Profile are part of Evangelic Eric’s job description, but the foolish lad hasn’t been able to stop trembling since I began studying the phenomena of Stigmata and the potential income St. Onuphrias’ could generate from becoming the global headquarters of Anglican manifestations of this miracle. Consequently it’s probably better I deal with these myself:

1) On the left-hand side-bar is now yet another award. Presented by Kirkepiscatoid - Missouri’s finest lover of history, books and everything else worth caring about, I may have been a trifle tardy in expressing my appreciation, but that should in no way be considered as a lack of gratitude on my part, and everyone reading this is ordered to visit Kirkespicatoid’s esteemed blog and leave a comment expressing their thanks for her having bestowed this honor upon the World’s Greatest Bible Teacher.

2) As Pennsylvania’s wisest cat-lover reminded me a month or so back, the address of MCJ – the bottom-most of our “Gathered Brethren” links - has changed. To be honest I purposefully left off changing it, since the “Access Denied” message the old URL was showing at least had some integrity, which the belly-aching pro-Obama Democrats who seem to be taking over that place sadly lack. Still, for anyone who cares, the Midwestern Conservative Journal is now at www.themcj.com. Obviously they needed to add a the to distinguish themselves from all the other Apostate Liberals calling themselves “mcj”.

3) Some time ago one of my young Facebook friends named Matt Wills (who loves the Brewer Brothers almost as much as I do) asked me to confirm that his blog called A Very Ordinary Title for a Blog really does belong to him. However probably due to my modest Christ-like nature I’m not very proficient at all those new-fangled Facebook things - you wouldn’t believe how many little green-patched fish (or whatever they’re called) I’ve managed to kill while trying to raise funds to send ice-skates to the Sahara (or some such worthwhile cause) – and so I think I may not have correctly done whatever it was that was needed to help the good lad feel confident that it is indeed him who writes all those fine posts in his blog.
Consequently I’m commanding everyone here as a matter of Biblical urgency to visit him immediately and offer reassurance regarding his ownership of the aforementioned blog. After which everyone should then go to Matt’s other blog Looking Forward to the Past and do the same thing there. As I always tell my Bible-class students: “Not only is it educational, but it might teach something.” And there is a Google advertisment which when clicked on led to some most arousing images of young people in bathing costumes getting excited about a weight-loss program they said I can trust.

I’m Father Christian and I teach the Bible.

P.S. To the guy who keeps sending emails pestering me to install his “Random Bible Verse Generator”: There’s nothing random about anything in the Scriptures – they were all dictated literally by God (or something like that) expressly so that GAFCON leaders like myself can twist them into saying whatever it is we want them to say. And if anyone’s going to be generating any new Scriptures around here it’ll be me. Understand?

4 comments :

Fred Schwartz said...

I would go to these blogs but I am afraid that I might learn something new and useful and thereby destroy my blissful ignorance which in turn might turn me away from conealones and into a liberal apostate. I would then lose my hotline to God and where would I be then!

Pierre R. Wheaton said...

Was Eric trembling with joy or dread at the mention of stigmata?

Leonardo Ricardo said...

Was Eric trembling with joy or dread at the mention of stigmata?
Lucky Pierre

Sometimes I get a great deal of extra heathenlike joy out of the comments...thanks Pierre

Pilgrim said...

How did I manage to miss your mention of Matt Wills until now? I repent in sackcloth and ashes. Be thou merciful to me, O Most Blessed One! I shall go visit Matt immediately if not sooner.